This is another topic that is partly based on my last post.
Today I went to the store & One isle caught my eye.
I've mentioned before that those perfect images make us feel like we are doing something wrong with our life We degrade ourselves, wishing we could be just as pretty, and admirable.
This post is especially dedicated to the young girls out there that don't know where to go or who to be due to continously alternating media signals & role models.
Curvy or skinny? Big ass or tight little bum? Huge or small perky chest? Tanned or fair skin?
How do I know what they expect me to look like? What does it take to be pretty? How do I appeal to the boy I like?
All the different ideals of beauty that are lingering in 2015 are screwing teen girls/womens lives over.
We are all born with specific genes and features and now people want us to suddenly have a huge bum? To be tanned when we get sunburned very easily in extreme exposure to the sun? They expect us to have tight little waist with perfectly proportional chest?
And they seem so helpful releasing all those magazines on how to gain weight and get curvy, on how to train your butt so you fit in the big bum club. They have even tested a million self tanners to suggest you the one and only selftanning product.
And yet other magazines tell you how to lose weight, how to stay toned and get the perfect bikini body.
You know if anything you might aswell be skinny,tanned and have a big bum!
And while we are at it. let's work on your personality. Because we all know that we can't just be pretty on the outside, we also have to be perfect on the inside!
"Guys are Attracted to Curvy Women"
I'm assuming that Sonakshi Sinha has a naturally curvy body, and is trying to rebel against the "skinny trend". She is stating that every man out there prefers curvy girls over skinny girls.
So all the naturally skinny girls will have a hard time finding a man or are naturally less attractive.
I do not find this empowering at all. Even if I was a naturally curvy girl, I'd find this absolutely uneccessary.
We do not live in the cavemen days anymore where the female with the most female hormones is winning the competition, because she is the most fertile woman.
Yes, there are still some psychological remains of it, but those only make men be more attracted to healthy looking women.
Now, despite the fact that women don't live to please men, it is also not healthy for us to force our bodies to look a certain way.Nor is it healthy for us to segregate our own gender into " attractive and less attractive", "right and wrong".
What she is saying is, in my own opinion, something she is doing for herself, to feel good about her curves, to defend herself, after trying to be skinny for so long.However she doesn't realize that she is on one of the most popular magazines for girls/women, making them feel worse about themselves with the first word they are reading.This applies to hundreds of "Role Models" out there.
After doing some research I came across this.
This picture shows Sonakshi Sinha, and her massive weight loss.
She made her own lifechoices, and it is her own lifestyle but how is someone who is never even content with themselves, someone to reach out to young girls. Telling them how to be.
And there is so many more ideals we get thrown in our faces that we don't even stand a chance to accept our own bodies just the way they are, whether it's skintone, bodyshape or eye color.
Let's read these precious lyrics:"Yeah! This one is for my bitches with a fat ass in the fucking clubI said, where my fat ass big bitches in the club?Fuck the skinny bitches! Fuck the skinny bitches in the club!I wanna see all the big fat ass bitches in the muthafuckin' clubFuck you if you skinny bitches, what?! KyuhHaha, haha" - Nicky Minaj, Anaconda
If I had to put this into 2015 language I'd say : #compensatinglackofselfworth #insecurities
All I see women do in media is trying to justify their own body size. "Yes I am curvy so what you skinny bitch?", " Maybe you should eat less burgers you fat jiggly hoe".
Why do we feel the need to justify what we were born with? What is media doing to us that we feel wrong in a body that's been made for us?
The lack of selfworth in our generation is getting bigger and bigger. And so is the level of compensation.
We have to love ourselves before anyone else. Love our bodies. We can work out, we can do surgery, but only if it is our own choice. If we do it for ourselves and not to prove anything to anyone. We have to accept our beauty.Because yes, you are beautiful in every way.
What media does is make us believe that changing ourselves completely and being unhappy with ourselves is normal.It is a necessary status quo for that industry to be successful. What would they write about if girls/women were happy with themselves and did not long for constant change?
I think 80% of their topics wouldn't have an audience, since women would feel strong and above all judgement.
Media is the superhero that will never actually catch you when you're falling.They will test a hundred products for you, give you so much advice. But in the end they still require you to feel insecure. They have to keep you unhappy, by inventing more and more things you can change about yourself. They need you to believe that not accepting yourself as you are is alright.But it is not.
Studies show that depression in young girls is rising and rising.We have to commit drastic changes in our thinking, now! [here] & [here]
Truly being at ease with your own body is the healthiest thing you can do.Living your live chasing what you, and only you desire.
And a magazine telling you how to change your personality just so everybody likes you?You do not need that. Never in a million years will one human being manage to make everyone love it. Why?
Because if everyone loved him/her, one would always not love him/her for being so loved.
I want you to imagine yourself and everyone around you as colorful, still in progress, paintings. All of them are made with a great love for detail.Every single one is unique. Some paintings colors hamonize better with other specific paintings. And together they create a beautiful compostition. However that doesn't make it harmonize with every other painting, and it doesn't have to, since it is already beautiful.
As the paintings get older they add more and more colors.But at one point all the paintings decide to tell each other how ugly they are in order to feel like the best. And a certain group of paintings takes advantage of that and tells you to draw different colors on your painting that will make everyone see you as a "better" painting. But you will be unhappy with it, cause it doesn't actually match your true colors.
Never deny what you truly are! Never pretend for anyone. Never change for anyone. Be you. Be the creator of the worlds first "You- Painting". No one can copy it, cause they don't have the same starter color kit. Internalize this, for your sake.
This can be applied to all men out there aswell, but that will be another post.
I love you, please love yourself too!
